EMDR Therapy Explained: What to Expect, How It Works, and Why It Helps
If you've been on a healing journey for a while, you may have heard the term EMDR therapy floating around. Perhaps you’ve been intrigued by the name—Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing—or you’ve seen the promising research that shows it can bring profound relief to people struggling with trauma, anxiety, and the baggage of old, painful experiences. But what is it, really? And how can something that involves simple eye movements or taps actually help your nervous system rewrite its past? This guide is a deep dive into the why and how of EMDR: a powerful, evidence-based approach that doesn't just manage symptoms, but works at the root level to help your brain and body finally process what’s been stuck, leading you toward a more grounded, integrated, and authentically free life.
What Is EMDR Therapy?
EMDR stands for Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing, a form of psychotherapy developed by Dr. Francine Shapiro in the late 1980s. It is a structured, evidence-based approach that helps people heal from trauma, anxiety, and distressing life experiences by allowing the brain to process stuck memories in a new way.
At its core, EMDR doesn’t erase memories — it helps the body and mind reintegrate them. When something overwhelming happens, the brain’s natural information-processing system can get “stuck,” leaving sensations, images, or emotions frozen in time. EMDR reactivates this system, helping those memories move toward resolution and integration.
EMDR uses bilateral stimulation (eye movements, tapping, or sounds that alternate between left and right) to gently guide the brain in releasing the emotional charge related to the targeted memory. I have observed surprising and significant shifts in client responses to formerly distressing events or activating moments through my work utilizing EMDR.
Is EMDR Evidence-Based?
EMDR is one of the most well-researched trauma therapies available. Many controlled clinical trials and decades of outcome data have shown EMDR to be effective for PTSD, anxiety, grief, and other trauma-related conditions.
The EMDR success rate varies depending on the issue, but research shows that around 80–90% of people with single-event trauma experience significant improvement or complete resolution of symptoms, often in fewer sessions than traditional talk therapy.
Organizations such as the World Health Organization (WHO), U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs, and the American Psychiatric Association all recognize EMDR as an evidence-based treatment for trauma.
How Does EMDR Work in the Brain?
When a traumatic event or recurring trauma occurs, the brain’s normal way of storing information can become overwhelmed. Instead of being filed away like a completed story, the experience remains active — stored with the same intensity of fear, shame, or panic that occurred in the moment.
EMDR helps the brain reprocess and desensitize those experiences by activating both hemispheres — similar to what happens naturally during REM sleep, when our eyes move back and forth and the brain consolidates emotional material.
Through bilateral stimulation, the client brings up a memory in small, manageable doses while the therapist tracks their emotional and body responses. Over time, the memory becomes less vivid, less distressing, and more integrated into the person’s broader life story.
In simple terms, EMDR allows the nervous system to do what it naturally wants to do: move toward healing, completion, and balance.
Who Is EMDR Therapy For?
EMDR can support anyone whose present life is still being shaped by unprocessed experiences from the past. It is used to treat a wide range of concerns, including:
Post-traumatic stress (PTSD and complex trauma)
Anxiety, panic attacks, and phobias
Grief and loss
Chronic shame and self-criticism
Attachment wounds and relational trauma
Sexual or spiritual abuse
Negative body image or eating-related trauma
Systemic oppression and injustice
EMDR is powerful for both people with “big T” traumas like accidents or assault and for “small t” traumas, such as lifelong systemic oppression, childhood emotional neglect, bullying, or moments when one’s identity, body, or truth was not affirmed.
EMDR for Anxiety
Anxiety often lives in the body as a signal of unfinished stress and is sometimes expressed through addictive behaviors or impulses. EMDR helps by locating the root experiences that taught the nervous system to stay on alert — for instance, identity related shame, moments of humiliation, unpredictability, or fear.
By reprocessing these memories, EMDR helps the body update its information: “That was then, this is now.” The result is a calmer baseline, less overthinking, and greater capacity to respond rather than react. In my experience, EMDR can offer a sense of empowerment where you have felt unable to incite change through other methods previously.
EMDR for PTSD
For post-traumatic stress, EMDR helps shift the brain from survival mode to integration. Clients often find that triggers lose their power, flashbacks lessen, and self-blame softens. Many report being able to remember the event without being overwhelmed by it — as if it finally belongs to the past.
EMDR for the LGBTQ+ Community and Queer Healing
As a member of the queer community myself, I feel a deep calling to hold space for my fellow queers and provide a welcoming and comfortable therapeutic environment where you don’t have to hide any part of yourself. We often have distinctive experiences of oppression based trauma as members of the LGBTQ+ fam, and our healing journeys are often set apart too. For those healing from religious trauma, identity-based oppression, or body shame or dysphoria, EMDR is one way we can support you at Reverie as you reclaim your inner safety and authority. The process honors both neuroscience and the sacred — the innate wisdom of your nervous system.
Queer and gender-expansive folks, in particular, often carry implicit memories of oppression, shame or rejection. EMDR helps untangle these stored experiences, reconnecting you with your wholeness, intuition, and belonging — truly giving you the newfound liberation to express your wonderful and special magic in your life and in the world!
What to Expect in an EMDR Session: The 8 Phases
A full EMDR process unfolds over eight phases, though the pacing is unique to each person. Sessions are collaborative, and safety is prioritized above all else.
1. History Taking & Treatment Planning
Your therapist learns about your history, strengths, and current challenges. Together, you identify memories or experiences to target — moments when you felt powerless, unsafe, or unseen.
2. Preparation
You’ll build grounding skills, calming techniques, and a sense of internal safety before beginning reprocessing. Many therapists use imagery, somatic awareness, or gentle mindfulness practices here.
3. Assessment
You select a specific memory and identify the negative belief (“I’m not safe,” “It’s my fault”) along with what you wish to believe instead (“I am safe now,” “I did the best I could”).
4. Desensitization
Through bilateral stimulation, the memory is activated while your brain begins reprocessing it. Emotions may rise and fall — this is part of the brain’s natural integration process.
5. Installation
You focus on strengthening the new, adaptive belief — pairing it with the previously distressing memory until it feels fully true in your body.
6. Body Scan
Your therapist will invite you to notice any sensations or tension that remain. The goal is for the body to feel relaxed and aligned with the new belief.
7. Closure
Each session ends with grounding and stabilization so you leave feeling centered and safe, even if the reprocessing is ongoing.
8. Reevaluation
At the next session, you’ll check in on how you’ve been feeling and assess whether more work is needed on that target or if new material has emerged.
What Do Therapists Look for During EMDR Therapy?
Therapists pay close attention to your body language, breathing, and affect — signs of when your system is ready to go deeper or when to pause. The goal isn’t to push through pain, but to stay in the “window of tolerance,” where healing can happen without overwhelm.
Why Do People Cry During EMDR?
Tears are a natural part of release. During EMDR, the body is finally allowed to feel what it couldn’t feel before. Crying, shaking, or sighing can signal that the nervous system is processing — not breaking down, but letting go.
Dangers and After Effects of EMDR
While EMDR is considered safe and non-invasive, it can be emotionally intense. You might experience vivid dreams, fatigue, or temporary emotional waves after sessions. These are signs that your brain is integrating.
Common EMDR after effects include:
Feeling tired or dreamy
Heightened emotions for 24–48 hours
Memories resurfacing with less intensity
A need for extra rest or reflection
These are not “side effects” in the negative sense — they’re natural responses to the brain’s healing process. Gentle care after a session helps: hydration, journaling, grounding, time outdoors, or connection with a supportive person.
Why Is There Controversy with EMDR?
When EMDR was first introduced, some clinicians were skeptical — the use of eye movements seemed unconventional. Over time, neuroscience caught up: we now understand that bilateral stimulation mimics the brain’s natural processing rhythms and facilitates adaptive memory integration.
While critics once dismissed EMDR as “too simple,” the evidence base has since made it one of the most respected trauma therapies worldwide.
EMDR Is NOT for You If…
You’re currently in an unsafe environment (EMDR works best once stability is established).
You have untreated psychosis or active substance use that interferes with grounding.
You don’t feel emotionally ready to access trauma memories (your therapist can help prepare you first).
Healing can’t be forced — and a skilled EMDR therapist will always go at your nervous system’s pace.
Can EMDR Work Virtually?
Yes. EMDR can be done safely and effectively online with specialized software or simple tools like bilateral audio tones or on-screen tapping cues. Many clients find virtual EMDR more accessible and comfortable, especially when processing trauma related to in-person environments.
At Reverie, virtual EMDR sessions are designed to honor your comfort — integrating somatic grounding, relational presence, and trauma-informed care even across distance.
TL;DR – The Purpose and Benefits of EMDR
Heals trauma at its root rather than just managing symptoms
Reduces anxiety, flashbacks, and shame
Improves sleep, mood, and emotional regulation
Reinforces self-compassion and resilience
Connects mind, body, and spirit in recovery
Research shows that EMDR can achieve results in 6–12 sessions for single-event trauma and offers meaningful relief for complex trauma over time.
Healing Beyond the Session
EMDR is not about reliving pain, it is about reclaiming your story. I am consistently amazed by the ways activating memories stored in the body are integrated through EMDR, leading to a more grounded nervous system baseline and a heightened connection to oneself. When your body no longer carries the weight of what happened, you can meet the world from your wholeness — grounded, alive, integrated, and connected.
If you’re curious about EMDR or wondering if it might be right for you, I invite you to reach out. At Reverie, EMDR is practiced with compassion, relational depth, and reverence for the sacred work of becoming free so you can express your unique magic in the world!